What does J-E-T-S spell? Inconsistent.

While nursing the consequences of a fun filled Saturday evening for my 25th birthday, Sunday's performance by the New York Football-less Jets could have given a sober 70 year old woman a hangover. For the past few weeks I've found myself looking desperately for the same team that manhandled the undefeated Tennessee Titans, and keep coming up with what looks like the same old disappointing Jets. They could have locked the division up weeks ago, but after disappointing losses to Denver and a horrendous 49ers team that was without Frank Gore for half the game, they continued their downward spiral yesterday. By some miraculous act of something otherworldly, they managed to score 10 points in the fourth quarter without even managing a first down. That's almost the equivalent of saying, they won the game even though the other team outplayed them...wait a minute, that's actually what happened.

Jets fans have the idiotic play calling of Bills coach Dick Jauron to thank for this half-hearted miracle that gave us an early Christmas present. Had Jauron called a running play and continued to give the ball to Marshawn Lynch (who the Jets couldn't tackle all afternoon), they'd probably have the win all locked up. I am convinced however, that Jauron did this to torture the soul of every Jets fan, including myself, who now have a renewed false sense of hope going into the last two games of the season.

The Gang Green go out to Seattle next weekend to play the Seahwawks, a team who barely beat the Rams yesterday, yet still nearly upset the Patriots last week. This is a game the Jets could very well lose, and judging by how they've played lately, have a 50/50 shot at losing. Jets play the Miami Dolphins in the final game of the season, which if both teams win next weekend will decide who takes the AFC East, and who gets to go home.

Games like the last 3 the Jets have played are the reason Brett Favre's beard gets a shade grayer each week (though he's partly to blame for their shortcomings this year) and may likely be his reason for actually retiring (again) after this season. I'd like to see Brett back (mainly because Kellen Clemens isn't our savior), but will not be angry or disappointed if he isn't. Eric Mangini is great at finding a game plan, and using it...for the entire season, even when it stops working or teams figure it out. Prime examples: They run the ball almost every time Leon Washington is on the field; If Brad Smith is in, they're going to some sort of ridiculous triple reverse option (Smith didn't play yesterday, and I think the team is better off with Clowney in. He's a faster and better receiver, and his name is Clowney.) They don't blitz anymore and wonder why Shaun Hill looked like the reincarnation of Joe Montana last weekend. Luckily J.P. Losman might be the worst QB on the planet, thus a main reason to why they won against the Bills.

Long story short (I know, too late.), the Jets, though they seemed to be the new and improved Jets at the start of the season and especially after the Titans game, are the same old Jets. Or as Mr. Hurley in "Big Daddy" called them, "The goddamn Jets." That's right, their horrendous shortcomings have been so bad in the 1990's/2000's that they get a shout out by a drunk old man at the Blarney Stone in an Adam Sandler film (If you saw the game yesterday you'd also notice Sandler was at the game, as well as Michael Douglas).

I really don't know where I'm going with this whole post other than to revoice what was once my former disdain for the New York Jets. I rewatched "Step Brothers" and "The Dark Knight" before and after the game yesterday in my day of lethargy, and both were more rewarding and fulfilling to watch than the Jets have been in the past 3 weeks. I hope this does not understate the greatness of both films, as it is not my intention for the overt crappiness of the Jets recently to be so dismal that it would mean watching "The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift" would also be more rewarding or fulfilling.

One more sidenote: what the hell is up with Chad Pennington? The guy leaves the Jets then unleashes 40 yard passes of the likes we have never seen? Must be the warm Miami weather loosening up his once linguini-like arm.

How Will Belichick Win Without his Golden Boy???

My breakdown of my Week One NFL picks (which were as inconsistent as wardrobe changes at an Elton John concert in Vegas) will be coming later on this evening, but for now, here's a great(and I mean great) take on the harsh reality the New England Patriots now face without their franchise, quarterback Tom Brady, for the rest of the 2008 season. Jeffri Chadiha of ESPN.com makes a substantial and tangible argument in the case of Patriots coach Bill Belichick: Without Tom Brady as his quarterback, Belichick historically, is a loser (cue my laughing out loud like a crazed buffoon).
Chadiha analyzes Belichick's coaching record with the Cleveland Browns and the Patriots before Mr. MVP came along. 42-58. That's right; his horrendous tenure in Cleveland, followed by a 5-10 first season with the Patriots in 2000, and the starting of the 2001 season at 0-2. Then, enter Tom Brady, part savior, part magician, and now, depending on how the season goes, Belichick might end up looking like the great and powerful Oz when Toto gnawed at his curtain to reveal a weak, sad, and pitiful little man. The Patriots won the Super Bowl in 2001 with Tom Brady and the same team that went 0-2 before he started running the ship. Now, we will see how skilled Belichick is since his golden boy is done for the season. The weakened Patriots O-line, and weathered, aged defense won't have 40+ points per game to rely on when Matt Cassell is screaming for the refs to "Blow the whistle!" like Papke, the backup quarterback in "Necessary Roughness."

Cheers to Jeffri for saying what everyone else is afraid to say; that it is possible that while Belichick is no doubt a legendary coach, he hasn't been tested without his star quarterback in the post-Super Bowl phase of his career. If Belichick fails miserably, it will be redemption for him abandoning the Jets when Bill Parcells handpicked him to be his successor in 1999. If he doesn't, it is what all the sports pundits will attribute to his genius game planning and talent management. I still think 18-1 is a much more stunning and widely known number than 42-58, regardless of how this turns out.

To check out Jeffri Chadiha's no holds barred column that gets my vote for the "what everyone is thinking, but no one has the brass tactics to say" article of the month, click here:

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/columns/story?columnist=chadiha_jeffri&id=3576284

If this guy is accurate, he'll probably end up taking Peter King's Monday Morning Quarterback column by season's end.

"Johnny Be's Week One Football Picks"

Washington @ NY Giants: The defending champions have a lot to prove in their own eyes. They just gave Plaxico Burress a hefty new deal and have a chip on their shoulder for being labeled a fluke champion last season. Jason Taylor will be worried more about getting his tango moves right on the nationally televised game instead of going after the quarterback. Eli Manning has gotten a bad rap the last couple seasons, but I think Brett Favre going to the Jets took some media attention away from him, and will ultimately help him continue to get better. After all, he is a Super Bowl MVP and his last name is Manning. His interceptions still wouldn't tempt me to draft him to my fantasy team though. The Giants should win this game, and I think will win 9 or 10 total this year and get another Wild Card Playoff spot.

Detroit @ Atlanta: Detroit will beat the team that once boasted a troubled quarterback who is now public enemy number one to dog lovers everywhere. Atlanta has a rookie quarterback, and not enough weapons on either side of the ball to beat an exciting passing offense in the Lions.

Seattle @ Buffalo: Buffalo is a much better team than everyone thinks, and has one of the best up and coming backs in Marshawn Lynch. I think the Bills will upset the Seahawks who are used to playing division 2 college level teams like the 49ers and Rams. A 7-9 team has a shot at the playoffs in the NFC West; that makes me want to spew.

Jacksonville @ Tennessee: A lot of the experts are expecting the Jaguars to do a lot this season, and rightfully so. They've got all their returning weapons from last season, which was overshadowed by an early playoff exit and a team trying (unsuccessfully) for perfection. The Jags are too good to go into Tennessee and let a mediocre team upset them in the opening game.

NY Jets @ Miami: This game might, might be close, but the Jets will win. Yes, Chad Pennington knows the Jets' offensive and defensive schemes, but the Jets also know Chad's T-rex arm. Therefore, the former team edge's go out the window, and the Jets should dominate based on overall talent on both sides of the ball, and the questionable running game in Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown, which won't pan out until week 4 or 5.

Kansas City @ New England: Tom Brady has been M.I.A. this preseason, but Shirly Temple could be at quarterback for the Patriots and they'd still win this game. The Chiefs still don't have a quarterback and let the one of their only stars, Jared Allen, go to the Vikings. Larry Johnson is going to have another bad season, and I'm just glad I wasn't dumb enough to draft him to my fantasy team because last year was not a fluke.

Tampa Bay @ New Orleans: Tampa Bay will be a contender in an open division this year, but the New Orleans Saints will return to the same form they rolled with in the 2006 season. They had plenty of offensive weapons already, and Jeremy Shockey will be effective (until he suffers another inevitable injury like he does every season) in this first season alongside Reggie Bush, Marques Colston, and a recuperated Deuce McCallister (who had season ending knee surgery last year).

St. Louis @ Philadelphia: I think the Eagles will definitely have a better season than they did last year, but some of these sportswriters around the country are nuts in predicting them to make the Super Bowl. If memory serves correctly, Assante Samuel is the same guy who blew it for the Patriots in the Super Bowl (along with their offensive line), and the combination of young linebackers they're relying on, and still having zero receivers will be their downfall. The Eagles will still beat the Rams who still need some reps to return to form with a hobbled Torry Holt, and unproven Stephen Jackson who bowed out early due to injury last year.

**Upset of the Week**

Houston @ Pittsburgh: While Pittsburgh will be expected to make easy business of the nonthreatening Texans, this is my upset pick of the week. I think the Texans will surprise a lot of people this year, starting with this game against the Steelers. The Steelers are not the same team that won the Super Bowl a couple years ago, and the Texans are not the same team that has been unremarkable the last couple of years. I see the Texans winning about 8 or 9 games this year, and same for the Steelers. Andre Johnson will have a couple receiving touchdowns, and Mario Williams will put Big Ben on the turf a few times.

Cincinnati @ Baltimore: Rookie Joe Flacco will start for the Ravens, but their defense is what wins them games. Cincinnati will be playing with a recovering Chad "Ocho Cinco" Johnson, who will be roughed up by the physical Ravens secondary. T.J. Houshmandzadeh will be double covered and new tight end Ben Utecht might make a splash, but it won't be enough to beat a ruthless Ravens defense at home. The game will be close, but I think the Ravens will squeak this one out by 3 points or so. Not that it matters, since both these teams will be lucky to have 6 or 7 wins at the end of the season.

Carolina @ San Diego: Rookie running back Jonathan Stewart (not the host of the "Daily Show") is supposed to make some noise this season, but without their biggest offensive weapon Steve Smith, the Panthers are likely to get embarrassed in this game. If the Chargers don't win this game by at least 14 points, I'd be very surprised.

Arizona @ San Fransisco: The Cardinals should be a better team with Kurt Warner at quarterback for the whole season than they would be with Matt "Had great talent around him in college, but can't get it done on his own in the bigs" Leinart. San Fransisco has J.T. O'Sullivan at quarterback...J.T. O' who??? Exactly. Frank Gore, if he can stay healthy, should flourish again if he can get some passes out of the backfield in new Offensive Coordinator Mike Martz's system. Isaac Bruce reuniting with his old coach from the Rams should also make some noise. The 49ers defense should be good again this year, but with Fitzgerald, Boldin, the Edge, and Warner calling the plays, the Cardinals should win this close one.

Dallas @ Cleveland: On paper, Dallas is the best team in the NFC right now; whether Tony Romo continues to rack up numbers in the loss column during the playoffs is yet to be determined. Cleveland however, won't stand a chance against the Cowboys who have something to prove this year, starting with this game on the road. The departure of Julius for another Jones, rookie Felix, should help Marion Barber take center stage as the starting running back; a job he has undoubtedly earned over the past couple seasons.

Chicago @ Indianapolis: In the first Sunday night game of the year, America will still realize that the Bears don't have a quarterback. The Bears could literally go out on the field without a quarterback, snap the ball, and see what happens, and they'd still have as much of a chance as they do right now. Their defense can only get them so far, and a horrible quarterback will lose at least 2 or 3 games single-handedly for them. Even though Peyton Manning has been out of action during the preseason, Joseph Addai will take center stage in this victory for this AFC powerhouse of the past few years.

Minnessota @ Green Bay: In the first game of this Monday Night Football double header, this might be the best match up of the week if all goes according to plan. Aaron Rodgers is making his Favre-replacing debut against an improved, and already good Vikings team at Lambeau field. If Rodgers can stay healthy, then the Packers should be at least a 10 or 11 win team this year. However in the few appearances he had last season, while he looked sharp, he got injured rather quickly. I don't think Adrian Peterson will have as stellar of a season as he did last year, especially since his blocking Pro Bowl fullback Tony Richardson left for the Jets. An unproven Tavaris Jackson will have more pressure on him, but the defense should also guide the Vikings to a worthy battle of these two division rivals who will likely claw at each other for the division title all season. Either way, I think Rodgers has a lot to prove, and knows it, and will lead the Packers to their first win of the season at home.

Denver @ Oakland: Everyone is itching to see the Raiders and their first round explosive draft pick Darren McFadden hit the field this season in the second of two Monday Night Football openers. Along with former number one pick (and current Twinkie eating champion) the hefty JaMarcus Russel, the Raiders might improve this year. They've beefed up their defense as well with the addition of cornerback DeAngelo Hall, but still don't have an offensive line. This could be a problem for their horizontally expanding quarterback, and rookie running back. Denver is the more seasoned team, though they probably won't have a good season, but they should win this one by a touchdown.

Kevin Arnold Loved the Jets, And So Should You. Broadway Brett: El Capitan.

Remember "The Wonder Years," one of the greatest television dramas in history? What a great show (that I'm still waiting for on DVD), with a great main character, Kevin Arnold, who famously championed for Winnie Cooper's affections while donning a vintage Jets jacket at the height of the Broadway Joe era. Kevin's older brother Wayne is still one of the most hated characters in TV history, one that could make you want to put your fist through some drywall.

Anywho, here's a Broadway Brett update on the same day that the NFL's season kicks off with the Giants-Redskins game tonight. (Editor's Note: I've got Clinton Portis and Chris Cooley going on both of my fantasy teams tonight)

Yesterday it was announced that Brett Favre and Alan Faneca have been voted the offensive captains of the New York Jets for the upcoming season. While I would have liked to see wide receiver Laveranues Coles or maybe tight end Chris Baker as captains, I don't disagree with Brett being one, since he is expected to be the guy who leads this team all season. Coles and Baker lost some pull though when they got into contract disputes/holdouts with management in the off season. Faneca, while also being added to the team only a few months back still has pull over Jerricho Cotchery and Leon Washington, who are still a bit young to be looked at as captain material. Thomas Jones has only been there for one (lackluster) season at running back, and still has much to prove in the fans' and team's eyes, so that's not much of a surprise.
That "C" stitched on his jersey now won't make Brett Favre any better or worse; but same goes for Tom Brady's "minor" (stress fracture) foot injury. Here's my prediction on this ongoing rivalry between the AFC East opponents who meet for the first of 2 regular season match ups next week. The Pats and Jets will split their two games this year; I think the Jets have a shot winning it in week 2 since the Pats haven't (as far as we know) been illegally videotaping Favre on the Jets, and Brady might still be rusty. He will especially have trouble when Calvin Pace tries to rip his head off along with the rest of the revamped Jets defensive unit. Tom Brady, as Walter Sobchak (played by John Goodman) in "The Big Lebowski" best put it, is "entering a world of pain," this season. (See Walter below.)
The Jets will win 10 or 11 games (12 if a couple of the close ones fall their way) and get a Wild Card playoff spot since they don't play in the NFC West where a .500 team can not only make the playoffs, but win their division. The Pats will win at least 13 or 14, but their geriatric defense, and questionable O-line is going to be winded toward the end of the season like they were in last year's Super Bowl. That is why I predict the Patriots will lose somewhere between the first round and up to or including the AFC Championship, either to the Colts (if Peyton Manning stays healthy), Jaguars (another solid D that has a great season under their belt), the Chargers (if they can stay dominant without Shawn Merriman, because he'll take a career and/or season ending injury somewhere by mid-season with the bum knee he's adamant about playing on), or shall I say the J-E-T-S Jets?

A year or two ago I'd be labeled "looney tunes" for such a prediction. However, this is the first season in a long time any Jets fan can firmly say or believe that they have a legitimate shot to win any game they're in on any given Sunday. The Patriots are probably the most feared team in the NFL this season, and even they have questions coming into this year after going 0-4 without Tom and his bum foot throughout the preseason.
(Editor's Note: This is one of the best pictures of Tom Brady I have ever seen.)
Granted losing the biggest game in franchise history to end their season will weigh on the Patriots and give them extra tenacity this year, but on paper and on the field they are a weaker and more vulnerable team than they were last year. This is especially evident when one thinks about how they will need to have more left in their tank at the end of the season for a lengthy playoff run. Sure, Brett Favre is going to be 39 in a month or two, but the fresh life the Jets have breathed into their offensive line, backfield, and defense are more changes than the Patriots have made. If the same team that got pounded by the Giants defense (that boasted only one Pro Bowler) in the Super Bowl shows up this season, other equal or better defenses will be knocking the hobbled quarterback down even more this season.

Interesting enough, ESPN correspondent and Boston (yuck) fan Bill Simmons, has a somewhat similar view on the Pats and Jets. While he sees the Pats being questionable, he still has them making the AFC Championship, and losing to the Jaguars who he has for his Super Bowl pick. The Jets are his annual sleeper pick, though he has them losing their first two games on their way to a surprising 11-5 season. The record prediction sounds about right, but I see them winning at least one of their first two games, if not both. The third game against the Chargers is a toss up depending on whether Merriman is on the IR list by then or how much Phillip Rivers cries like Halle Berry accepting her Academy Award during the game.

You can read all of Bill Simmons's season predictions here on ESPN's website. Although I despise Boston sports teams, I like where his head is at. But I will say I think his view on the Giants is a bit harsh and skewed to the fact that they ruined his team's shot at perfection in the Super Bowl. While I think the Giants are going to have a tougher time this year with their losses on defense (Osi's knee surgery, Strahan's retirement, Mitchell's bouncing), I think Eli Manning will have a better and more consistent regular season than he has previously. They're definitely at least a 8 or 9 win team, but I still think the New York story of the year will be the Jets This is also due to the fact that the Yankees are horrendous this season, and the Mets are likely to come up shorthanded at the end of the season or in the playoffs, the ongoing trainwreck that is the Knicks organization, and the Rangers who have lost Sean Avery, JaomirJagr, and will probably end up at about the same spot they did in last season's playoffs.

Here are Simmons's thoughts:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/080904