"My Week 2 NFL Picks...A League Without Tom"

Tennessee @ Cincinnati: Vince Young's mom asked the fans to stop booing him. Well, he won't have to hear anymore boos as he nurses his injured knee for the next few weeks. Kerry "Where's the nearest bar, and I'll have a double" Collins is starting, but I'll still go Titans on this one as the Bengals aren't much to worry about. Cincinnati is in shambles right now, and the NFL refuses to let Chad wear the "Ocho Cinco" on the back of his jersey until he recoups all of Reebok's expenses or they sell out of their now useless supply of "C. Johnson" jerseys. When Young comes back from his injury, he could still be sitting on the bench as the Titans aren't taking anymore chances by bringing in free agent Chris Simms to bolster their bench.

Green Bay @ Detroit: Detroit got embarrassed last Sunday by the Falcons, who were supposed to still be figuring out their post-Michael Vick plans going into this season. Matt Ryan and Michael Turner put their minds at ease, and Green Bay will go 2-0 by beating up on the Lions in Detroit. Aaron Rodgers is looking good, but there's almost nothing he can do this season to make the cheese heads forget about Brett Favre already (especially while he's still wearing a different shade of green every Sunday).

Oakland @ Kansas City: It's a battle between this game, and the San Fran/Seattle game for which one gets most painful game of the week to watch honors. I think the Raiders will win this one, but honestly who cares. Neither one of these league laughing stocks will make the playoffs, but at least one of them will get the goose egg out of their win column this weekend.

NY Giants @ St. Louis: The Giants impressed early last week, and the Rams impressed high school teams all around the country that they could probably play a closer game with the Eagles. The G-Men will go 2-0, and I will continue to let Mark Bulger sit on my fantasy team's bench. Why do I pick this guy every year?

Indianapolis @ Minnesota: This should be a pretty decent game, but I think the Colts will return to form and pull off the victory. This is definitely a weakened team with a still rusty Peyton Manning, but the Vikings can't ride on Adrian Peterson's back all year, especially not starting in week 2.

New Orleans @ Washington: Besides the Rams, Washington looked pretty pathetic last week. I think their coach's days are numbered if they continue down this path, but they should get better as the year goes on. It won't be against the Saints though. The Redskins won't be able to keep up with the Saints offense, even if Marques Colston in out for at least a month. Devery Henderson and David Patten should see more passes come their way as well as Jeremy Shockey, while he can stay healthy. Reggie Bush looked impressive last week; add all those weapons up, along with their improved defense, and the Redskins have too much working against them.

Chicago @ Carolina: Both these teams surprised everyone last week, the Bears by beating the Colts at home, and the Panthers by winning a last second stunner against the Chargers. I'm not completely sold on the Bears just yet, especially since Peyton Manning was still brushing the dust off and Joseph Addai went out early for the Colts. The Panthers without Steve Smith, on the other hand, beat the Chargers, pretty much at full strength, in a close game. At home, the Panthers should win this one.

Buffalo @ Jacksonville: Jacksonville stunk it up last week against their division rival Titans, who didn't even play that well to begin with. Buffalo laid a beating down on the Seahawks who had no receivers playing. This one should be pretty close, but I think the Bills will pull off the win in a close one.

San Fransisco @ Seattle: Both these didn't impress much in week one, but even if both finish at 7-9, they'll have a shot at the playoffs in their joke of a division that is the NFC West. The Seahawks are the more experienced team, so at home they should take care of business and beat the 49ers.

Atlanta @ Tampa Bay: Atlanta beat up on the Lions last week with impressive debuts by their rookie quarterback Matt Ryan and new starting running back Michael Turner. Jeff Garcia is out for Tampa Bay, and Brian Griese will get the start. Atlanta should take care of the Bucs, though Griese might show us he's still got some gas left in the tank by keeping it close.

New England @ NY Jets: This is probably the most anticipated matchup of the week for two reasons. One, everyone wants to see how Tom Brady's replacement, Matt Cassell will do in his first NFL start, and two, everyone wants to see if the Jets are serious about taking advantage of Brady's absence and going after the AFC East. I think Cassell will turn out ok this season in Bill Belichick's system, but it will take him another few weeks before he gets comfortable in the role. The Jets will most likely throw a lot at Cassell when the Patriots don't run the ball, and Favre will get better as he spends more time on the field this season. This one should be close, but I think the Jets will win by a touchdown.

Miami @ Arizona: Miami and new quarterback Chad Pennington showed promise last week, and I predict the team will get better as Chad gets more accustomed to their system, and Ricky Williams gets less accustomed to fumbling the ball on every other carry. Arizona at home with a potent offense should beat the Dolphins D that no longer has Zack Thomas or the Lord of the Dance, Jason Taylor. I'll go with the Cardinals.

San Diego @ Denver: Shawn Merriman is lights out for the season on that Tom Brady knee he thought he'd be able to rough it out on. The Broncos looked sharp on Monday night annihilating the Raiders, even without the services of Brandon Marshall. However, what all these sports heads are failing to realize as they rant and rave about how the Broncos are back, is that they played the Raiders. Last time I checked, their Warren Sapp resembling quarterback hasn't proven anything, and they've still got more holes than Roger Clemens's HGH story. Even without a hobbled Merriman, the Chargers will still threaten this year, and I just can't see them going 0-2 to a team that is all of a sudden an AFC front runner one week into the season. The Chargers should pull this one out, but it will be close.
Pittsburgh @ Cleveland: Cleveland is still trying to figure out if last season was a fluke, and if they blew it by not trading Derek Anderson when his stock was at its highest last year. While they continue their pondering, the reemerging Steelers should start the season 2-0 while fans in Cleveland get to boo the Browns 2 weeks in a row.

Philadelphia @ Dallas: This is probably the best Monday Night Football matchup the league could have planned for in week 2, as both these teams easily embarrassed their respective opponents in week one. Philadelphia looked sharp last week, but Dallas still has too many weapons the Eagles can't have all the answers for. That, along with this being the Cowboys home opener, means they should win this one. I would say by at least 10 or 14 points.

Baltimore @ Houston: In an odd move, there's another Monday night game, but this one is scheduled to be on CBS. Both these teams didn't show much promise last week, though the Ravens won their matchup. The Texans should be better, but I have been saying that the last two years, and they seem doomed for a franchise of mediocrity and unrealized potential. The Ravens should win this matchup, and probably would if they were playing at home, but I'm going to have to go Texans all the way on this one. It will be close, but the Texans should get their first win of the season.